A Card and a Story

First up the card.   I made this last week when I had out Beyond Basics Borders to work on Dawn's color challenge.  Everything here is from PTI.  Colors are Cream, Kraft, Melon Berry, and Spring Moss.  Little different then my norm, but I like how it turned out.  If you like to read about me being tortured at the gym, read on!  If not, have a great day and thanks for stopping by.

A Gym Story

So the Friday before last I was at the gym, in my normal spin class, just spinning away and almost (well not even almost) enjoying my exercise routine when the instructor, Kevin, announced a new class he would be doing.  The new class was at the new gym which is a good 15 minutes closer to me.  The new class had a nice bland name: Sports Conditioning.  Now really, that doesn't sound too difficult does it?   I asked Kevin, " is there a lot of choreography?".  No, not at all he tells me.  This is good because I have two left feet, am beat deprived, and have a brain that has trouble with the simplest of verbal directions.  I am convinced my eyes see everything backwards because I have trouble figuring out even the most of basic of dance steps, even while I watch the person demonstrate.  What can I say?  I have issues.  So Kevin tells me this class will be great, wonderful, take no special skill, and that I most definitely can do it.  Hmmm,  I think what he meant to say was, "this class will kill you, its a special kind of hell I thought up to torture my worst enemy, even the most seasoned athletes will hit the floor crying and grabbing the their quadriceps while screaming in pain."

Since I was unaware of what he meant to say I went to the class.  It was at 5:30 last Thursday.  That is three full days ago.  It still hurts to stand up.  It hurts to sit down, bend over, walk up or down stairs, walk in a straight line, brush my hair, roll my eyes, and a bunch of other things too!  Yes friends, Sports Conditioning, really translates to Death Class.  There were crunches, lunges, weights, some horrid, horrid thing called mountain climbers, there was stepping up and down on a step...super fast, until you couldnt catch your breath, there were curls, flys, and a multitude of other things meant to make your arm muscles quiver.  By the time the class was over my legs were jello.  I was surprised that I managed to walk out of there on my own power.  I was by far the worst in the class... BUT all the other people in there looked they were about to die as well, and this includes the girl with the rock hard body who looked like she could knock me on my butt with a flick of her finger.   She left early.  I finished the damn class (amazing what potential humiliation will do for you).  I finished and I limped out on my own two feet.  I went home and sank into my favorite chair, where I had to sit the rest of the night because it was impossible for me to move again.  I sat there until Friday.  On Friday I had to get up and host a slumber party (because I am a glutton for punishment).  I stood all through the party... if I had sat I would have been unable to get up again, for any reason. 

I went back to the gym yesterday, you know... a little hair of the dog.  Just as a bloody Mary can perk up a hangover, a little elliptical and weights can help you once again be able to sit and stand.  Now don't get me wrong... it still hurts (ALOT!) but at least I can get out of the chair.  So let this be a lesson to you... Sports Conditioning = Death (or something very close to it that hurts twice as bad.)

Simple Tea Card

Made this a few days ago.  A combination of tea for two and everday basics.   I used Scarlet Jewel ink and paper and buttons.  I also used hibiscus buttons and my copics to add a little pink to the mix.  

Currently I am sitting here trying to force myself to go get on my gym clothes.  Spin class at 8:15 with the dreaded Michele.   Need. To. Go.   I just need to say this.... why are all those skinny girls at the gym?  You know the ones... the ones who are very clearly skinny by nature.  They could probably eat donuts all day long and not gain an ounce.  And there they are running or biking or swimming!   If it were me, if I weren't cursed with the genetics I am, I would not set one foot in that gym.  LOL!

More time in exercise hell

Things NOT to do at spin class (unless you enjoy jelly legs, a racing heart, and a pool of sweat at your feet).
1. Do NOT say, "Yes we enjoyed sub X, she really worked us hard."
2. Do NOT say, " Heck yeah Michele is hard, she is brutal."
3. Do NOT say, " I was crying last night in Kevin's class."
Apparently these things rile the spin teacher and bring out their competitive nature. They seem to want to prove that their class will make you cry too, that Instructor X may be brutal but they are beyond brutal. Ask me how I know this? Ah yes, I have uttered all of the above phrases. I find it best to try not to converse with the teacher at all. Best to not attract attention, lest the instructor stand at your bike and glare at you to go faster. Sometimes they not only glare, they yell. Positive yelling to be sure, but yelling all the same. And don't even think about trying to leave, they come and hunt you down. That wasn't me personally, but two other girls who decided the music wasnt to their liking. Michele went out, hunted them down, drug them back, changed the music, and then made us all pay. I have another class tomorrow. The dreaded Michele again. This is my first Wed. morning class (normally at work). I am looking forward to getting the exercise out of the way early on. Wish me luck!

Sara's Perfect Match Mondays!

Happy Monday!  This card was made for Sara's Perfect Match color challenge.  If you want to play just follow the link in the sidebar ---->  I used PTI's anniversary set, Everyday classics combined with Around and About (the long sentiment).  Colors used were: Summer Sunrise, Pure Poppy, New Leaf, and Hibiscus.   I should put up my hideous first card.  I tried using all those colors with guidelines 2.  Oh it was so bad!  I think I am still partially blinded by it!  Enjoy the rest of your day.

PS.  I had a few inquiries regarding if I am still spinning (bike class).  The answer is yes.  I am being tortured at least 3x a week... plus a day or two on the weights and elliptical machine.  blah!

A Warning

Do not taunt one spin instructor with information of how hard another spin instructor is....

I am just saying (as I drag my body to the shower...)

Just Wondering

why the spin instructor always yells out, "how do you feel?"  And then all the participants (except me) yell out, "Great!!"  I mean really, do they feel great?  I usually feel like I am about to die.  Or that I will never catch my breath.  Or I feel all greasy and sweaty.  But never, never do I feel like yelling out, "Awesome!!"   Maybe its just me.   I am fairly certain none of my ancestors exercised.  I am sure I have a non-exercise gene in me.  

Just wanted to add:  It was a relentless class tonite and truly thought I might get off that bike and fall to the floor.  Luckily my legs held me up and I made it to the car.

MMMmmm Cupcakes!

I have been a card making fool these past few days. I was in desperate need of birthday cards. This is one of quite a few that I made yesterday. Of course its probably no surprise that all the materials are PTI. I am thinking I could nearly support that company on just what I buy. LOL.

The Gym Update

So I went to spin class this morning.  It was Michele's class.  Now I hurt.  ALOT.  It's back to work for me tomorrow, for the first time in 2 weeks, so I dont know if I will be at the gym tomorrow.  

Cute Little Birdie

Is this not the cutest little birdie ever?  I got it in an alpha stamp pack by hero arts.  I love hero arts, not as much as PTI, but still I heart it alot.  The circle stamps are both from PTI- the borders and corners set.  The sentiment is from PTI's birthday basics set.  The trim... well I am not sure I bought it on clearance somewhere about a year or so ago.  I think its from Making memories.   I am shocked I am actually using it!  I dont know about you all but I have a horrible tendency to hoard things.  Those buttons are from doodlebug.  The sparkly ones I just got, the plain one is from ages ago.  The cardstock is PTI.  I love their cardstock, its so thick!  They have spoiled me.  Now when I hold a piece of Bazzill (my former favorite) I think, oh this is so thin!

The Gym

I haven't posted about it but I have been going.  I have completed one spin class since January 1st.  It was Kevin's class.  It was brutal and it was packed!  I hate January at the gym.  Every person in the city joins as a New Year's Resolution.  The parking lot is packed.  The  classes are crowded.  But then February rolls around and most of those poor souls are back in front of the TV.   I understand, its happened to me... several times over the years.   I mean lets be honest here, if I was a size 2, if I had good genes or the sense not to eat junk I would not set foot in an exercise establishment!  But I am proud to say this past October marked 2 years of going to the gym 3 to 4 times every week.   I am now working on year 3.   Now if I can only keep the crap out of my mouth I will be on my way to a better body.

I am helping people everywhere....

or else I am scaring them to death! One of the things I love most about sight meter is seeing what google search brought people to your page. I am seeing a lot of hits thanks to drano. Lots of people searching for "drano and my garbage disposal" or "help my garbage disposal has drano" or "drano in my disposal". So hey if that's you, don't put the drano in the garbage disposal! And if you have already.... be very careful getting it out! Right after my drano/disposal incident a friend of mine told me about a similar incident ending with burns all over the persons hands and arms! So be careful out there, all you do it yourselfers!

The other thing that had me laughing today was the google search... "gym punishment"! I was on page 66! Wow, I think for all the punishment I have seen I should be the number one hit! I did take a week off for Christmas. I went last night and did 45 minutes on the elliptical while I played with my new ipod. It was hard but not grueling. Tomorrow I will try to make it to spin class. We have been having a lot of out of town guests, so my time has not been my own lately. The gym is also a darn crowded place with the onset of a new year. All sorts of people come pouring in with the resolution to "shed fat", "look good", "get healthy". Luckily they are usually gone by February. Not that I dont want people to be healthy, but I hate a crowded gym!

Inside My Head at Spin Class

I took two classes this past week, one on Friday (Kevin) and one on Saturday (Julie). Both were difficult, especially since it had been a week since I had been on a bike. Kevin's was hard, very hard. Julie's was whatever hard is to the 100th degree. OMG. And she had already taught one class right before mine! And she taught a third after I got up and left. CRAZY hard. Anyway a random sampling of what was in my brain that day:

"omg, we must be done."
"what I have only been here 5 minutes?"
"stand up? again? jog? again?"
"I think my butt is jiggling so much I will have stretch marks"
"she is psycho... totally psycho"
"is that sweat? it is! omg I am dripping sweat!"
"is it over yet?"
"crap still a half hour"
"she is looking at me"
"go faster"
"this cant possibly get harder:
"omg I am going to die"
"i will have a heart attack"
"I am running out of water"
"is she dancing? omg she is!"
"this sucks!"
"why are all these skinny people in here?"
"if I was skinny I would never exercise"
"only one more song! yippee!"
this is the longest song ever!"
"this must be the extreme dance version"
"i think my legs wont work, how will i get off this bike?"
"praise be God, its over!"
"i hope thats sweat and not tears"

Because I have been bad...

Because I have not been going to gym as much as I am suppose to... I made myself go to Michele's class today. Not only is Michele evil but her class is an hour long (the other spin classes are 45 min). I also got their early and lifted weights for 15 minutes. This was my punishment and I deserved it. Hopefully the terror and pain from today will ensure that i make 4 days at the gym this week.

Gym Attire

On Saturday I hit the gym to try and work off the 5 lbs of candy that I have consumed. I got there late and missed the spin class... I wasn't terribly sad because Michele was the instructor. The only other class being offered was Zumba. I like to watch and laugh at them from the spin room... they look so funny dancing around... but I wasn't about to put myself in there. I have two left feet and no rhythm at all. So I headed upstairs to my friend the elliptical. I like the elliptical about as much as I like having my teeth pulled but it is better than the treadmill and stairmaster. Anyway I hop onto the elliptical and put on my headphones and try to psych myself up for a good workout. So I am cruising along, minding my own business, staring at the elliptical in front of me when suddenly I feel sick. Why? Because a man hopped on the very empty elliptical I had been staring at. This man was not in shape, which is fine-neither am I- thats why we are here. However he was wearing shiny spandex running pants and a tucked in tank top. Now folks, if you need to lose 50 lbs you should be at the gym. You should wear something comfortable. You should not wear shiny spandex pants that hug every ripple and dimple of fat. If you are a man and your stomach is 5x larger than your legs you should not wear spandex and you should definitely not tuck in your wife beater. And if you dont follow those rules than please, I beg of you do not bend over and display the very large rip in the crotch of your pants. I think I went a little blind. And then all through the rest of my work out I had to watch this crazy man jiggling in shiny pants with his underwear hanging out. I guess it could have been worse, he could have NOT been wearing underwear.

You Don't Mind If I Go Over Ten Minutes?

YUP, thats what she said. This was after she had nearly killed us for the better part of an hour. She sweetly said, "oh we are not done, you dont mind if we go over ten minutes?" And then, the incredible thing is that everyone said NO! I was screaming Yes, yes I mind! But I was breathing so hard my vocal cords weren't working. And also every cell in my body was focused on not falling off the bike.

When Spin Instructors Get Sick...

Today is Monday which means its a spin day. I have got a choice of classes since I dont work on Mondays. I can go at 8am and be killed by the previously blogged about, Michele. I can got at 9:30 and be toppled by Jen...race day and core work. Or I can cruise in at 3:45 and take it easy with Charlotte. Charlotte was one who got me hooked on spin. I bumbled into her class one day when I was sick of the elliptical machine but still had enough sense to know that I could not do step. Charlotte is lovely. She obviously has very good genes. She is tall, blonde, Swedish, and incredibly thin and gorgeous. She looks lovely in sweats and she looks lovely sweaty. These are two things no one will ever say about me. I have gifts but these are not them! Now one of the things I love best about Charlotte is she is not fanatical about exercise. Oh sure she tries to be... but really I can see that deep down she is not wed to exercise. When she goes to Sweden for the summer she doesnt exercise at all. So I know that secretly, she is not in love with exercise. I guess what I am saying is Charlotte's class is pretty easy for me. I mean, I dont feel like I am dying in there usually. Not that I dont feel challenged, I do, however I dont feel that death is eminent like I do in Michele'e class.

So anyway, I wander into Charlotte's class. She is there! Yay, no sub! I get on the bike, start to warm up... other regulars come in (let it be known 99.9 % of them are in better shape than me and clearly adore exercise). Music starts. Charlotte is not getting on her bike. what?

"Hi Guys! I am sick, I have a cold coming on. So I am just going to walk you through this and coach you today," she says.
What?, I am thinking, 'What on Earth is she doing?'
Let me tell you, I wish I had never found out. Coaching from the floor means she turns into that crazed lady from Biggest Loser. You know, the trainer? Yep, sweet Charlotte took on a whole new personality. She knows all our names too. She got right up near your face. And then yelled, "Michele (my name)!!! YOU CAN DO BETTER! TURN THE KNOB! PEDDLE FASTER!! YOU CAN DO THIS!! GO! GO! GO!"

This went on the entire class. I have never worked so hard in my life. I was dripping sweat. My legs feel like jello. The second class ended I slid off my bike and ran for the door... luckily all that sweat hid my tears of pain!

Spinning My Wheels

So the last time I wrote about spin class I was whining about the 8 am chick. You will recall that I said I would not be going to that class again. The instructor’s name is Michele. She is very nice… as a person, but then class starts and I start to feel all kinds of hateful towards her. Anyway I do my best to avoid her class because clearly I am not in good enough shape yet. I need a few more classes and a few less snickers bars before I go there again.

On Friday I was headed to Kevin’s class. Kevin is a big huge guy with lots of muscles. He is really into motivational stuff. His class is hard, no doubt about that, but frankly he doesn’t scare me like Michele. I get to class, I am actually early! (That’s because the kids were left at home with their father.) I get on the bike, start warming up. I am in my happy place, all pleased with myself that I came to class. The door opens, I look up. Who is it? You guessed it! “Hi Everybody! Thanks for coming! I am Michele and I am subbing for Kevin! Are you ready to work??!! We have loads of hills and sprints coming up! You will love it!”

Can I tell you I felt tears forming in my eyes? Only my pride kept me on that bike. I wanted to leave so bad! But I didn’t. I stayed and was slowly tortured in every way possible. I did more sprints than I have ever done before. I thought I might completely pass out. I drank ALL my water. The only thing I hate worse than exercise is drinking water.

I watched the clock, praying to God that 4:30 (the end of class) would come quickly. It seemed to go on forever. Finally we are within 5 minutes. I am dripping in sweat. I probably lost 5 pounds in water weight. (Yeah I am sure I put it back on already.) I am ready to cool down and head out… and then perky Michele says, “ OMG! Is this class only 45 minutes?” Yes!!!! We all scream. “ Oh,” she says, “ I thought it was an hour, we are going to go over at least 5 or 10 minutes. I am so sorry is that ok?”
NO!!!! I want to scream. But I don’t, again the pride thing. All the other crazy exercise folk are saying no problem, lets go the full hour. These folks are insane.

I made it. Just barely. But I walked out on my own two feet. When I got home I fell on to the couch and begged my son to bring me a chocolate. Yes there is a reason I cant lose this weight.

Spin Class Nearly Killed Me

Decided that I would return to spin class today, I went back to the gym yesterday. Its always so hard to go back after missing a week and being sick. So today I think I will just go in at 8am and get it done with. I have never been to this particular class because in the summer I was never up early enough and then once school started I was kind of going in the afternoon or at the 9am class. So anyway I manage to drop off my kids and get myself down to the gym by 8am. I walk into class and who do I see but the hardest instructor every!!!! She subbed once for my regular afternoon girl and I thought I was going to die. So here I am, second day back, first spin class back, still cant breathe through my frickin nose... and here is this chick that is all muscle- the I look good-I am tough- I am going to kick your butt muscle. Of course she is smiling as she talks about what an awesome tough ride its going to be, she is just going to work us over! Oh I was afraid. Totally terrified. Felt my feet heading for the door but somehow I managed to coerce them on to the bike. It was so hard! Hard to breathe, hard to make my muscles move, and of course my butt hurt because I hadnt been on the bike in a week. Well I am here writing this so obviously I survived, but I am telling you just barely! I dont think I will be hitting the 8am class again anytime soon!

Exercise

The gym is calling my name and I am trying to hide here on the couch in my pjs with my laptop. I need to go but I dont want to! My last appearance there was on Friday. When I walked into the spin room I saw the instructor who is the most difficult. Normally she teaches the am Monday and Wednesday class, which I haven't been to since school started back up. I have mentioned her before. She can kick some ass. Her entire body is muscle, not an ounce of fat on this girl. Its pretty muscle too, not bulging body builder muscle, just firm-I can kick your ass and look hot while doing it- muscle. Truth be told the second I saw her I wanted to turn and run upstairs to my friend the elliptical machine. But I didnt want to look like a quitter, plus she knows my name and probably would have demanded to know where I was going. I am not afraid to admit that she scares me a little! So I made it through, but when I was done my legs felt like jello and my heart was about to thump out of my chest. But I lived and now here we are at Sunday and I need to go back. The next spin class is at noon, its 9am now. I should go.... I need to go.... I will be back to let you know how big of a wimp I was later.

Rustic Branches

This card was made with the fabulous Pine's Rustic Branches set. To think that I almost didnt purchase this set! Its awesome and so versatile, it can be Christmasy or springy or even fall like. Love it!
Supplies: PTI rustic branches, kraft cardstock, pure poppy ribbon. copics, versamark ink, palette ink, and white embossing powder

**** In Non Crafting News*****
I started seeing kids in the science/computer lab today. Oh it is so much fun to teach science. Today we had a little fun with dry ice! The fourth graders had fun with rulers, static, and styrofoam beads. So much fun stuff.

After work I made the dreaded trek to the gym. Another day, another spin class.... this guy who instructs this class is crazy hard! And its like the harder it gets the happier he is. I think he thrives on sweat and pain. I thought I might pass out, I ended up taking off after 45 minutes because my blood sugar once again started to crash. UGH! I think I might have to start bringing juice instead of water, of course this just adds back the calories I am trying to rid myself of! Oh and it would probably help if I quit eating candy. So tomorrow is another day, hoping I will do better.

Gym... continued

OMG I was just reading my stat counter page and I saw someone found my blog by searching, "girl with six pack abs". Bhhaaahhaaaa!!!! Sorry sweetie, you wont find that here! (Ever!)

BTW: went to the gym, nearly was killed by the girl with the six pack abs, skipped core because I had the beginnings of an "insulin headache", the precursor the previously mentioned Steel Magnolias moment.

The Gym

I hate exercise. I mean hate. I dislike it immensely. I do not like sports. I do not like to watch them, I do not like to play them. I hate them all with an equal passion. I suck at them. I have two left feet who do not listen to me. I dance like Elaine on Seinfeld. I am completely uncoordinated, I trip and fall even at the ripe old age of 35. Seriously when it comes to things of a sporting nature I am severely screwed up.
Unfortunately for me I also possess a fat gene. (Actually I suspect I have many many fat genes.) Lets just say my ancestors were never going to starve to death. I put on weight by looking at food. I think chocolate bar and I am rewarded with my fat cells swelling. I actually put the chocolate in my mouth, I have instant poundage. Because of this stupid fat gene (or genes) it becomes necessary for me to exercise. If I dont I will end up being one of those people so fat they cant leave their bed and the next thing I know the Discovery channel will be making a documentary of my life.
On top of the fat gene I also have type 1 diabetes. I wear an insulin pump. This helps make exercise slightly more difficult. If I exercise too much or too long my blood sugar bottoms out and I have a my own personal Steel Magnolias moment. ( You know the one, where Julia Roberts freaks out and they have to pour orange juice down her? yeah, been there and done that.)
Ok so now I have two strikes against me uncoordinated, nonsports like and freaks out easily. But yet I drag myself to the gym. 4 times a week is my standard. I need to go 7 times a week. Seriously, my doctor said so. But I average 4. Rarely less, lots of times more. My standard is spin class. (Indoor cycling to music) If you have never been to Spin let me tell you it is hard. Some classes harder than others. My usual class (I go 3x a week to spin) is taught by a lovely girl, who is thin and fit and toned, with six pack abs. She looks awesome in spandex. She looks awesome sweaty. (I however resemble a large sow.) She has scary arm muscles, I know she can kick my ass and probably my husband's too. The other class I frequent (also spin) is taught by another lovely thin girl with six pack abs but her arms are a bit on the wimpy side. I am not afraid of her. I think I could squash her. LOL.
So my point? What was my point? Ah yes, today is spin day. With the first girl, the one who can kick some ass. 45 minutes of spinning and then 15 minutes of core work. Core work? Whats that you say? Core work is designed to make you hurt for the next few days. It involves lots of crunches, push ups, crazy leg lifts, these scary things called gliders, balance work. (Did I mention I have no sense of balance, I cannot stand on one foot for any length of time!) So on spin days like today I tend to have conversations with myself. They go like this:
Me: Gotta go change for the gym. gotta get the kids ready.
Self: You dont want to go there. She will kill you today. She is probably going to have race day.
Me: Eh, I can do it, I have been doing it for a year now.
Self: Yeah a year of all this work, have you lost any weight?
Me: Well no, but you keep convincing me to eat ice cream and cookies
Self: Well we deserve a treat.
Me: All this work, nothing to show for it
Self: Well we could just quit
Me; No because then the Discovery channel will be calling.
Self: All right fine, go get dressed but you will be sorry in an hour when you finish your tenth push up. You will wish you had listened then.
Me: Yeah I know.